The Case of the Missing Croc

LOST:

A Right-Footed Croc

Size: 6\7

Weight: about 5 oz.

Color: Blue and Red

Responds to: Righty, Crockie, Ol' Crocster, Crocodillian, Mr. Croc

If found, please contact me or James' right foot immediately

Granted, this is the picture from the Croc website; the one missing does have quite a lot more wear-and-tear. Just to keep in mind. I could have taken a picture of the actual Croc that we own, but I am just not that good.

Here's the story.

We were on our way to Mimi's house to celebrate Susie's 14th birthday. As we were loading up everyone into the car, James starts to do the dance. The Potty Dance. Dave had already locked up the house, and I didn't know if we had enough time to find the keys, unlock the door, and get to a toliet. Luckily, James is a boy. I rip down his pants and let him go, right then and there. While he was doing his business, however, he starts to 'toup' on me. (If you don't know James, a toup is a fart). This causes both he and I to break out laughing, resulting in potty everywhere. Great. Now I have strip down the boy, get the keys, open the door, get new clothes, and get my half-naked boy dressed. While I am inside getting new clothes, Dave takes care of the potty soaked boy. We get things situated again and head off. After a night of wonderment and festivites, we arrive back at home. I see that Dave has put all the dirty clothes on the steps, but I don't see the Crocs that James was wearing during the incident earlier that evening. I ask Dave where they are, but he doesn't know. I ask James where those Crocs could be, and he of course, doesn't know either. Hmmm.

Now, today, it is Friday. The missing Crocs have been out of my mind for two days because I assume they'll show up somewhere, right? I wake up to go on my run, and start off going the same route you would if you were heading to my in-laws. As I am running...BAM! CROC! On the ground! I think, "Hmm....that looks just like one of James' Crocs....Wait...we are missing James' Crocs....Wait a second, that is James' Croc!!" So, I pick it up, and continue on my run. (I wonder if it was weird for people to see a grown woman at 6 am running down the road holding a toddler's Croc. I, for one,  would have thought it was completely normal). I start to think that maybe, just maybe, Dave put the Crocs on top of the Jeep as we were leaving for the party and as gravity was in play,  they both took a dive for the pavement. As I continue on my run (remember, with Croc in hand), I desperately look for it's mate. No such luck.

When I get back, I ask Dave about the possibility that he could have put the Crocs on the Jeep's roof. He says very likely. Later this evening when we went on walk to Mimi's house (and maybe Clara was wearing the last diaper in the my house and maybe we were going to Mimi's to "borrow" some diapers...Thank goodness she lives close, and thank goodness she has diapers, and thank goodness she's nice and not judgemental of me running out of diapers), I had James look for the missing Croc as well. No luck again.

So now we only have one Left-footed Croc. I don't know where Righty can be. I hope he is warm somewhere, and has found a good home. Someone to love him, clean him, and not leave him on roofs of cars. One can only hope.

If you read this, Righty, we miss you. Come home.

Questions of the Day

Q: Why do I have so much fruit in my fridge?
      A: Seriously. I counted at least 10 different varieties. Strawberries, kiwi, grapes, pineapple, cantaloupe, lemon, orange, apples, applesauce, bananas....Give me some big earrings and a hat that could hold fruit, and I'll be your Chiquita banana lady.

Q: Are these dishes clean or dirty in the dishwasher?
      A: Dirty

Q: When doing pig tails on my daughter's hair, why can the part never be in the middle?
       A: I try dragging an imaginary line from her nose all the way back with my comb, in my mind, insuring that I will have two equally parted groups of hair with a straight part. This never happens. My daughter is just going to have to live lopsided.

Q: Why am I so freaking cold today?
    A: Have no idea. I just want to go stay in my bed all day.

Q: What is the universal kid law that states when Kid A grabs a toy, Kid B immediately has to rush over and grab the toy from Kid A. And Kid B is bigger, and should know better.
     A: I don't know the technical term, but some scientist seriously needs to spend some time in this area and find me some answers to reverse this cycle.

Q: Will I work out today?
     A: Only time will tell.

Q: Seriously, what is up with my mouth?
     A: I don't know, but now in addition to having achy teeth (It's like the bones actually hurt. Does that even happen to teeth?), I now have about 10 canker sores. TMI? I don't care! They are on my lips and even on my tongue! These mouth issues have got to stop. I am hoping by posting this that all my dentist friends who read my blog will come to my rescue. (By saying I have dentist friends who read this, I should say, I have no dentist friends).

If you have any real answers to these questions, do tell. :)

A Runner's Rant

Seriously. It is four a.m. and I am up because my mouth hurts. My teeth are aching and are in severe pain. What the dill? I want to rip them out. These drugs better kick in soon. What better to do at such an early hour than write a blog post while you wait for the meds to kick in? I thought so, there is nothing better.

Yesterday I went running. There had been forcasted a huge storm coming our way, but to my surprise, all we were having was beautiful blue skies with those puffy, white clouds. So once Dave came home, I was gone running. I was doing five miles, which was supposed to be my "long" run done over the weekend, but due to some fluish symptoms that were had earlier this week, it was postponed until yesterday.

I was about 2 miles in when I heard a car slow down behind me. I started to think two things. One, "How sweet, Dave came to cheer me on!" or two, "Is this going to be some creepy person who says, 'Nice job...lady...?" Neither options were true. It was this annoying nice lady in a ugly nice green minivan yelling out her window to me. "Umm, did you know that there are thunderstorm warnings?" I said that I did, and waved her on. I don't know why, perhaps her condescending tone in which she talked to me, but she really bugged me.

Here's why:
First, it was a beautiful day out. I know that if you blink to long in Michigan the weather can change instantly, but seriously. It. Was. Amazing. Out. Second of all, I wasn't the only "crazy" person out enjoying the weather. Kids were playing, two guys were mowing their lawns, and there was some kid with Bieber-like hair walking along the road with fishing gear. (To my Beibered hair friend, stop trying to get your long locks in place. It's windy out. Your hair is not going to lie perfectly). Third of all, I was a responsible runner and did check the weather before I left. I even made an emergency plan with my husband. "You know if it starts raining, you have to come get me. I'll be on the side of the road, crying." I hate running in the rain. Fourth of all, what was I really supposed to do with this information, assuming that I didn't know about the imending death storm? I am out, running.  Start to run home? I know that she didn't know this, but I was just as far from home if I turned around or kept going. If a flash storm happened right then and there, would she be prepared to have me jump in the car with her? If I said "No, I didn't know," what was her next course of action? Just say "Well, I thought you should know..." and drive on?  Or what? I think this point bugged me the most. Just was exactly did she think was to be done at this point, after her gracious warning?

Well, I made it home without my husband needing to plop the kids in the car to go pick up his soaked, crying wife.

I don't know why it bothered me so. I thought about it the rest of my run, and got pretty frustrated. I even thought of all the things that I would say in my blog post about it. Once I got all worked up about it, I got some pretty bad heartburn for the rest of my run. Karma. I know that lady was just trying to be nice...I guess.

Easter

Happy Easter!

What a beautiful Easter Day today in Michigan! The sun is shining and the birds are chirping! I was so thankful that we were able to do our Easter egg hunting outside. I believe it is good for the soul. Church was amazing too! What a good-for-my-soul day!

Good Idea, Bad Idea

Good Idea: Going outside to play today. It was amazing! Slight wind, sunny skies, fifty degrees. I'll take 200 more days like that, please.
Bad Idea: When kids are outside, going inside for a quick drink (and perhaps quick glance at the email). Clara fell off the tricycle, straight on her nose, with no hands to block her fall. Poor widdy. Seriously, I am waiting for the knock at my door with the officials saying I am not a fit momma. Under my watch in the past couple of weeks Clara has: burned her hand on my curling iron, got incredibly sick with the flu, and now has a black and blue nose with blood. I just don't see how I can last.

Good Idea: Doing all the "sick" laundry this week. Literally, I must have done about 20 loads in two days.
Bad Idea: Washing a diaper with all that laundry. Little diaper crystals were everywhere. Luckily, I just had to wash that one load again which seemed to take care of the issue. Still. Bad Idea.

Good Idea: Watching "The Middle."
Bad Idea: Putting the kids to bed early so you can catch the show. Since we got rid of our cable and DVR, I can't expect to watch all my favorite shows when I want to watch them. I need to watch them when they are on, otherwise, they don't get watched. The kids were definitely not ready for bed. Though they were "in bed," going in every five minutes or so to replace a pacifier or give a  hug, I basically didn't watch the show. And I ree-hee-hee-eally  wanted to. (Channel Dr. Cox there. I've been watching a lot of Scrubs).

Good Idea: At naptime, watching Scrubs on the computer in bed (ahhhhh) with a big bowl of Breyer's Oreo Mint Ice Cream. Then getting seconds. It's really good.
Bad Idea: Seconds.

Good Things: Getting to the eye doctor today, getting new contacts, seeing my husband today, having a husband bring me a pot of tulips home.
Bad Things: Snapping at James for saying "Momma, Momma, Momma!" over and over again. I said what everytime, but he still was like a CD on skip saying my name. I shouldn't have snapped, but I did. I was sorta in a foul mood for a good half hour there. Also, those Old Navy Polo commercials.

There you have it. The good, the bad, and the ugly.

Not for the faint of heart

So.


Its been a long couple of days. A long, gross, pukey mess couple of days. Blech.

Since Friday night, my whole little Hocker family of four has been completely consumed with the flu. There is just no denying it. My laundry room is full of foul laundry to wash, we've gone through who knows how many bottles of Gatorade and Pedialyte, and our DVD player has put in overtime in the amount of movies we've watched these past couple of days. It just hasn't been fun.

Dave came home from his track meet Friday night and seemed fine. He went out to Wendy's with the track kids after the meet, and all was well. Fast forward to later that night where the, you know, begins. We chalk it up to food poisoning and move on. I take the kids to Mimi's house to let him get some rest. Enter Sunday evening, when Dave is seeming to be on the upswing. James takes bath because his tummy hurts (which makes sense to me- he ate two pieces of pizza at dinner!) to help. After I hear him cough (or choke? It was a very weird sound..) I go to the bathroom to see that he has tossed the cookies. A couple hours after that, it was my turn! Yay! And in the morning (after being up all night, you know...) we find that Clara indeed did get sick too, but didn't let us know. It was dried everywhere in her crib. She even handed Dave a grape from her dinner when he came in to get her. So nice of her, right?

So let's recap:
Number of times someone, you know...: 20+
Number of times someone, you know....in the toliet, or right place to throwup: Let's say 12ish
Number of loads of laundry we've done: Countless
Amount of time spent watching movies: Probably three days straight
Days taken off work: Two

Hopefully, we've reached the end. No one has done anything for almost twelve hours, so that has to be a good sign. We're praying we get done with this soon!

Aren't you all glad you stopped by to read my bloggity blog today?

P.S. Shout out to Mimi and Corie who provided us with things to survive- laundry soap, movies, coloring books, Pedialtye, Sprite, etc.. We are so grateful. And even more grateful that we didn't get you sick!

Dave, Karly, and Harry: I love you.

Today is a very important day for two reasons. First, it is my brother and sister's wedding anniversary! Six years ago today this happened:

Lauren, Karly, and Me

Karly's sister Lauren and myself.



He looks so little here! I guess I do too....



So it's pretty special that today it's been six years for them. Congrats Dave and Karly! I do love you both so.

The second important thing that happened was I got this in the mail today:

De de deee! I didn't even order it! I went out to get the mail with the kids, per usual, and there was an Amazon package in the box. If you read my sister's blog at all, you know that she loves, loves Amazon. I was so surprised to open the box and see those three looking lovely people back at me! D & K got me this just because the love me. They're pretty awesome, right? Too bad the only thing that I got them for their anniversary was a phone call. They are definitely the better gift givers, to be sure.

My Entertainment Weekly

I love getting my Entertainment Weekly. It truly is a high point on my Fridays (or Saturdays, which by then, I am a little peeved that it hasn't come on Friday. But that's beside the point). Dave gets about forty-eleven sports magazines, and this is the one magazine that I get, so it is a pretty big deal. (I really want to know, how can there be that much to write about sports? On a weekly basis? In so many different magazines?) So, I would like to post my own version of EW, and list some things of the entertaining variety that I am anticipating.

Bossypants.

There is something about Tina Fey that I just love. This past year I have really enjoying getting into 30 Rock. I can't believe I haven't watched the show until now! (Though I did watch some episodes last year) Every week, I love her. Therefore, I can't wait to read her book. I've been hinting to a certain someone that I am married to that I really have been looking forward to this book. Hopefully, that someone gets the hint. We'll see.

Harry Potter 7 Part One.

If you know me, you know I love Harry Potter. Love Harry Potter. I want to enroll into Hogwarts. Unfortunately, since this is a work of fiction, I am unable to do so. I think this might be the first DVD that I buy when it first comes out. I want it that bad. (Wait- I did buy season three of The Office when it first came out, but that's all. I promise). I won't be getting it on Blu-Ray as this picture implies. We're not that fancy over here. And if you can guess where I am going with this, the next thing I am most looking forward to is....

Harry Potter 7 Part Two

Seriously, don't you just get chills looking at that movie poster? I mean, I think that it says everything that needs to be said. "It All Ends." I. Can't. Wait. And even better news, reading on my trusty ew.com, I've come to find out that they had a documentarian film behind the scences when they were shooting the final films, and plan on possibly releasing that documentary. Let's just say, I hope they do.

Water for Elephants

This is the next book we are supposed to read for my book club. I've had it patiently waiting on my nightstand for a long, long time. My MIL just raved about it, and I can't wait to get into it. I know it is now being made into a movie with R. Pat., but to be honest, I was excited to read it before all that Hollywood hoopla. I just have to finish LotM before I can start it (and that book just will not end!).

Adele.

I'll be honest, I don't really know any of her songs. I don't know any of the songs off her first CD, and I haven't heard any off this CD. Yet everywhere I look, people seem to love and rave about her. So I am interested in just checking her out.

Something Borrowed.

My main reasons for this are A. I like two of the four actors/actresses in the movie and B. It seems like it has been a long time since a good rom com has come out. Since this one is based on a book (that I started to read, but don't remember why I didn't finish it), let's cross our fingers and hope it's good.

The Office.

I'm not excited to see Steve Carell leave. I am excited, however, to see how they handle his departure and who replaces him. I personally can't imagine Scantron without him, but the show must go on. Does anybody else think they should have ended the series with him leaving the show? I mean, the show has been hit or miss these last couple of years, and to continue on without him, I think that we might land more on the 'miss' side of things. Oh well. We shall see!

So, what's on your Entertainment Weekly? What are you looking forward to?



Today...

- I woke up to the sound of rain through my open window. Both the rain and the open window are two very good things.

- I had a sad daughter all day, who needed to be in my arms, all day. Culprits of such sadness could be due to A. Sickness B. Teething. I am going with B., since she was feverish, had a runny nose, and when she was crying in her high chair at lunch, she kept pointing at her mouth. And when I say all day, I mean all day. Even just a quick bathroom break  for myself was too long for her to be out of my arms. Poor widdy. I did love cuddling with her, though.

- I had a daughter who took a three hour nap and a son who took a two hour nap. I know, I am spoiled.

- I did a lot during said lengthy naps. I....worked out, cleaned two bathrooms, got rid of all the old, gross leftovers in my fridge, cleaned up from lunch, dusted the cobwebs from the ceilings and walls, got grossed out by how much cobwebs their actually were to dust in my house, considered sending out an apology to all peoples who have been in my house for the last 2.5 years, since I was apparently having you for a visit in a spiderwebd, stretched, and lastly, wondered why is it that when I decide that I am going to take a nap while the kids do, they end up taking one of those annoyingly short thirty minute naps, but when I decide to actually stay up and do some things around the house, they sleep forever? I'd rather only clean for thirty minutes and sleep for two hours. Oh well. 

- I almost didn't work out today during naptime because I was actually having a good hair day and didn't want to put my hairin a ponytail. How lame is that? I wasn't even going out or anything. No one was going to see me. Why did I care about saving my good hair day?

- James fell and skinned his knee. Nothing that a Woody bandaid can't fix.

- We played outside! Though it was a bit windy, wasn't it just lovely today?

- I again started to read Last of the Mohicans, and after three pages, stopped. This book is going to be the death of me.

Now....

- I am in bed while typing a blog with my hubby sleeping next to me. I have two sleeping kiddos in their beds. I have my window open with a cool breeze coming in my room. I hear all the lovely night sounds as they fill up the night, and I think, Life is good.

My Volvo

My cousin sent me this video the other day, and as a former Volvo stationwagon owner, it totally made my day. You see, my parents, back in the day, had this blue Volvo stationwagon and when they got a new car, they gave the Volvs to my grandparents. I remember my Grandma driving it all of my life. When she got older and couldn't drive anymore, it was given to us cousins to use as our car. In high school and college, we each would get a turn with it every other week or so, which worked out pretty nicely between the three of us. It was a pretty sweet ride. I did have some Volvo pride, because you have to admit, though it is a ugly car, it has something that is oddly cool and attractive about it. In college, I had it one week, and it wouldn't start. Sad day. Mind you, it was about twenty years old, but still. I still have the memory of it being towed away out of the Bowles apartment complex parking lot. Sigh. There were a lot of good memories in that car.

The video is is explicit, so if stuff like that bugs you, I wouldn't watch it. Or as my cousin said, "Don't watch it when the kids are around." I understand that most of you probably haven't owned a beauty like this, so the video might not warm your heart as much as mine, but it is still worth your time. I promise you'll be a better person for it.